Now Recruiting Members For The Anti Lego Army!

[Lurtz]

NOW RECRUITING! COME AND SUPPORT US SO WE CAN STOP LEGO, WHO IS STEALING ALL OUR G/FS! lol roflmao :thumbs:

[Mirkgirl]

hehe I don't care for the g/fs, but I have the sneaking suspicion he's capable to steal b/fs too lol so count me in ;)

:thumbs:

[Lady Melody]

:elfqueen: <--- This is certainly copied from Sailormoon!!!

Anyways...

:knight: I stand to DEFEND Legolas!! :knight:

And be the ones in my way get :trout: :gaga: :flamer: :battle: and :( :archer: Hahahahaha....

^_^

[Akiba]

ha like you ever had gfs can you say jealouslol ok back to the fort and take that pfbbt

[Bonos-Girl]

we will defend legolsa to the last :knight:

[Pil]

*a camoflage clad girl strides into view...bow and arrow at the ready...grim look on her face*

"CHARGE!!!!!!!!!!!!" :battle: :archer: :flamer: :knight: verymad :angry:

*multitude of ORLI'S ARMY members (which i add GREATLY outnumbers the amount in THIS army) charge at the unsuspecting anti-leggy army....and SMASH THEM TO BITS!!!!! TTTTTIIIIIIINNNNNNNYYYYYY BITS!* :evilcool: :evilcool: :evilcool:

[Pil]

Originally posted by Lurtz
WHO IS STEALING ALL OUR G/FS!

I'm sorry....but YEAH RIGHT! lol

[Bonos-Girl]

You can't fool us into thinking you actually had /f in the first place!!!

[Catz]

2 points Lurtz honey.....
1: Legolas has not stolen your Girlfriend....im sure id have noticed :rolleyes:
and
2: of course the Leggy supporters outnumber you.....there are only two of youlol
other than that....knock yourself out sweety...and if you dont, im sure Pil will lol lol
:catz:

[Orc]

Originally posted by Catz

2: of course the Leggy supporters outnumber you.....there are only two of you

and then there were three. pfbbt

Here I come to save the day......

Fear not my anti-Legolas breathren for it is I the mighty Orc who has come to reform these misbegotten elf lovers with copious ammounts of fish flogging.

:trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout:

If you g/f b/f is dumb enough to even attempt to fight their way throught the current fangirl hordette, they aren't worth your time and effort.

[Catz]

ok ok....6 tops....and we can beat that easy......
begone foul leggy scorners else we shall flog thee with the sacred blond wigs.......
and thats MY trout......trust an Orc!!!! im surprised he hasnt eaten it!!!:rolleyes: :trout::trout::trout::trout:
:catz:

[Mirkgirl]

6:3 hmmmm :naughty:

*Mirky gathers the team* "Now that's what we'll do - each of us takes two, on a signal we show them a double-sided lego board. Then we pull it back, the legofans crush one in another and we can have a pinic with the trouts"

[Tar-Ancalimë]

which leaves me to come to the rescue, is that it?

[Mirkgirl]

Oh hush

[Orc]

Beware foul Leggy loving fangirls, for I wield the sacred and all powerful Ronin's Stiletto. Capable of piercing even the thickest mithral, and warn at one time by the infamous fanboy himself. Now, quiver in fear, or I may have to smite thee.

pfbbt

[Tar-Ancalimë]

smite away!
nothing shall stand between me and my elven-prince!

(haha i wish he was mine)


Ps am i stupid? what the **** is Ronin's Stiletto ?

[Akiba]

have no clue either but I am invincible :thumbs: oh and Legolas Rules:p hey I'm not a foul leggy fangirl I just think he's......................... ok whatever ohhhh dude prepare to feel my wrathverymad pfbbt

[Mirkgirl]

You don't want to know, trust me....

*Mirky retreats to a save possition from Orc... and then walks futher...* "And he's in my camp!"

[Tar-Ancalimë]

ha-ha! who's backing off now?

[Mirkgirl]

Wait till you see the Ronin's Stiletto

And I'm not backing off - I'll catch the ones who have been able to escape ;)

[Legolas' Angel]

Legolas is WAY better than every guy put together and WAY cuter!!! :loveyou: Am I right? This means war to all you non Legolas lovers!!!!

[Lurtz]

ARRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

beware evil elven scum! for the orc and half orc and other member (race unknown as of now:( ) will smite thee!!!!!!!!! *checks to see if orc has Ronin's Stiletto, sees that he does) says to members, "aaaaaarrrrgggghhhh!!!!!! the time is now right, for orc has his Ronin's Stiletto, i have my arrow with flaming marshmallow, and mirkgirl has her weapon!!!!!!!!! so let us leave this bunker and smite the enemy!!!!!!!!!!!!!" all run towards leggy club, and i smite my two enemies with flaming marshmallow arrow, facial expressions when they realize why i snuck up from behind, :elfeek: :o "take that evil elven scum!!!!"

[Elf angel]

<Spying is over..Elf angel runs as fast as she can ...like the wind..ever graceful..to Leggy's camp to warn about the raid!!>

[Mirkgirl]

*Just before the camp Elf angel meets someone she takes for an elf... in the next second Mirky's sharp blade touches her thin neck.*
"One word and you'd meet Miriel and share her grief!"
*Mirky whistles and a big black horse comes over*
"You come with me!"
*Mirky sends Elf angel to her Lego dreams with a precise stoke with the handle*
*Mirky locks the unconscious Elf angel in the dungeon and joins her orc aliases*
"I smell elven scum, I smell marshmellow blood, I smell victory!"
btw I'm human. Simple but effective.

[Elf angel]

<Pil & the gang came & :trout: :archer: every orcs & rescue
Elf angel....:whoohoo:...& ran ever graceful..again.. back to camp..pfbbt>

<Gonna rest & plan for the next attack>

*back in enemy's camp,Mirkgirl is jumping up & down:p & give her stupid orcs a big fat pfbbt for letting the enemy escape(ever
so graceful)..*

[Lurtz]

hmmm...the enemy has escaped...we must compensate for the loss...i have an adoptive brother in the east, who is currently king over the mountain...he will assist us...if he comes...

[Mathew6]

hark i have come in time of need to assist thee, me mathew6 the dwarven smith and i bring great gifts,1.mithral armor for all 2. walkie talkies a newly developed dwarven communication system, 3 new "mithral" arrows for lurtz,4 a heart for orc, 5 courage for mirkgirl,and 6. a brain for lurtz

[Akiba]

I'll make sure he doesn't get there I am not so easily defeated *akiba jumps on her horse("ever so gracefully") with bows and arrows on her back and a sword at her side and rides off to who knows where just somewhere where she can find out the next plan and kick leggy basher butt* bwahaha you will all soon feel my wrath

[Mirkgirl]

heh, thanks mathew6 m8
*Mirky sucks up the courage and smashes akiba while the latter is wondering what is happening ("ever so gracefully" ofc)... Soon the lego drooler turns into an ever-so-graceful-pile-of-marshmellows*
HUZAH

[Akiba]

didn't I say I was invincible!!!!! *akiba shotts two arrows at mirkgirl "ever so gracefully" and blows two holes right through her chest then sneaks up behind mathew6 with his big bag of goodies and smacks him right on the head with flat end of sword (just not not permanently injure a newbie) and rides off laughing her head off at the sight of the two leggy bashers completely bashed* akiba invincible!!!!!!!

[Naraku]

didn't wanna make enemies so fast but down with Legolas!!!! naraku has come to help bringing many weapons at your disposal

[Tar-Ancalimë]

oh another stupid (j/k) brain who thinks elves and their protectors are not invincible? Wow, are we really scared! (but ever so gracefully! and we don't STINK!)

Legolas invincible!

[Gowpon]

Gowpon walked in, looked around curiously, she haden't been back for days and were wondering about this new thread...

Recruiting Members for the ANTI legolas?

Ohm someone needs to risk her life to stop this madness!!!pfbbt
And it's me! Gowpon!!!!!

I say LEGOLAS-MY-BOY is WAY COOLER THAN ORCS!!! OR URAK-HAI OR WHATEVER!!

i'm prepared to die...but...:brave: :brave:

[Mirkgirl]

Originally posted by Gowpon
[B]Recruiting Members for the ANTI legolas?
B]

Well, I'm stupid, but please explain it to me - how recruiting ANTI legolas is so strange, but gathering for a group drooling over him is ok?

[Catz]

well thats easy Mirky......its just unnatcheral y'see lol
Oh and Matt??? i just got this message from Dr Frankenstein who would like you to return the sheeps brain you stole since it was his lunch and hes a bit P'd off....
And Orc.....you FOUND it...but please......who gave the fanboy the stilleto to start with i ask you???????
its hardly going to harm ME *catz whistles the first three bars of "the Stripper" to activate the homing enchantment on the infamous stilleto, which flies thru the air to land in her hand...incidentally taking out several smaller orcs on the way.....:naughty: ;)
:catz:

[Lady Melody]

I actually forgot to tell you guys...I'm a sorceress!!!

*starts zapping anti-Legolas army with light-pink light flashes which stuns and kills orcs but just turn those bad-karma people into stone*

:elfqueen:

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.....veryhappy

[Gatsby]

Spies a swarm of elven archers from mirk wood,a nd runs over to greet them
"we've come to defend the honour of our captain and our prince!!"
Gatsby, "thank god you've come!! it's getting pretty nasty in here, hopefully ou will return peace to the forum"
a really good looking elf comes over to gatsby and kisses her passionatly, "for luck" he whispers. Gatsby who is stunned beyond words, grabs a her quiver and bow and runs to catch up with the company of hotties. "damn he's a good kisser" she thinks as she jogs back to camp.
out
gatsby

[Tar-Ancalimë]

hey save a little :loveyou: for me!!!

man we've got them creamed!!!

[Mirkgirl]

Oh, welcome to the camp, naraku!
Do you see that crazy elven girl thinking she is invisible?

[Naraku]

ok now its on Naraku will have his revenge and unleash it on all lego droolers prepare to taste cold steel!!!!!!!

[Tar-Ancalimë]

heehee when did anyone say invisible?
i heard invincible

[Naraku]

naraku send minions to spy on supposedly invincible lego drooler ha invinncible yeah right minions return to the camp laughing evilly Naraku sends sword whizzing through the air at Tar....blah blah perfect in the way targetpfbbt

[Mirkgirl]

I heard neither... I read invincible tho

And I was making a joke... that what is seeing to invisible, that's akiba to invincible

[Tar-Ancalimë]

I get it.
And by the way elves have perfect aim not you naraku!!

(ARGH! What was I saying about peace? FORGET IT!! iM AT WAR WITH YOU NOW FOR YOUR LOUSY SHOT!!!!!!!!)

[Naraku]

who said it was an arrow? huh huh? yeah that's what I thought I am skilled in the arts of sword battling combat yeah that's right run tar blah blah run!!!!

[Tar-Ancalimë]

i didn't mention arrows either... did I?

and you're the one running, cause of your delusions

[Akiba]

oh I see mirky has it in for me and desires to be destroyed by my hand not that I blame her only jealous of my invincibility and great warrior skills *akiba lunges at mirkgirl with sword in hand* then after that easy piece of work goes out to destroy other orc people leggy bashers just for a bit of entertainment and you know what I just noticed so far only the wimpy naraku and "mirky" have been active hahahaha where are all your friends now huh huh *cackles evilly then rides away "ever so gracefully" towards camp to celebrate with really hot elves and report to Legolas elven price*

[Mathew6]

first of all i not a newb i just havent been on lately, see my pics are in the member pic album and all, second did u see the accuacy of gimli's throwing axes and all, i forgot to tell you i brought and inexastible quiver of throwing axes, plus many more battle axes at that, and besides it takes more than an arror to pirce mithral,i mean with the skew a wild boar thing and all, so dont underestimate the slowly growing anti lego army*throws twenty well aimed axes and catz and akiba

[Akiba]

time out sorry about that ok time in ummmm akiba too quick and dodges "ever so gracefully and in the words of largo "ph33r my mad skillz!"

[Mathew6]

o cmon got an infinate amount i got plenty where that came from, and i might even have to pull out the big guns, the new vortex 1000 super battle ax with a falshlight base*twinkle twinkle* so i wont be giving up any time soon, good thing all the anti lego team has me or theyed be beat up by the time one of then posted

[Tary]

Tary and is army of skilled elfs come from the north tary shoots Naraku in the head with his elven bow.Tary the tall fair and brave come to the rescue with reinforements.Down With legolas haters!

[Akiba]

you seem to think very highly of yourself ohhoho akiba will bring you down *evil*

[Mathew6]

ahhhhhhhh!!! where are my friends, o well i guess my strike team's time for need is now, yes i have an elite covert operation strike tean nothin but the best ori,nori, balin , bombur ,oin, gloin, fili ,kili , and in the lead is, yes it is gandalf the grey has joined the anti lego side

[Tary]

are you talking to mathew6 if you are talking to me then thats a mistake cause me and my elfs are good we are here to help.

[Mathew6]

good? what are you talking about you bunchu swooning,elf loving,flurtatious people,oooopssss o wait did i just describe you or someone else

[Tary]

Tary shoots mathew6 in the right arm and wounds him.

[Tary]

How dare you say such things Tary shoots mathew6 in the left arm.

[Mathew6]

now i see it all you elflovers act just like dwarves cmon you swoon over the elves you are not unlike us band together with me and we shall deafeat the dreded legolas!!! bwahahaha!!!!

[Tary]

Gandalf is only pretending to be on your side gandalf hits mathew6 on the head with is staff.

[Mathew6]

o cmon you realize gandalf likes dwarves so much better than elves i mean he assitsted then in their own quest he was just scolding me for thinking that evil thought

[Tary]

Oh I have heard enough Tary aims his bow at mathew6's heart this saft has a mighty sting my freind Tarry says. Tary's elves surond mathew6 and tie him up.

[Mathew6]

ha if you thought that blow would paahse me you forgot i am wearing solid mithral armor so all then arrors didnt even hurt

[Tary]

YOUR TIED UP YOU are out of the battle six gaurds are watching you even though you are tied up to a tree and can do nothing.

[Mathew6]

stupid fellow team members when will they be online i need saving*starts hitting o and flirting witht the female guards and attemps to let them free him

[Tary]

this is tarys gaurds they are not female.

[Mathew6]

*starts flirting with the guards becaus ehe is very desperate and attempts to have them let him free

[Tary]

gaurds beat mathew6 an the head and knock him out!

[Mathew6]

*wakes u to find his clothes are rearranged and the guards seem to be winking and laughing at him*

[Tary]

BACK TO THE BATTLE okay tary shoots six enemys and knoks out Fili Kili and bombur OH NO some how mathew6 has escaped and got back to his army he is wounded and the healers start helping him.

[Mathew6]

yep nithin like the ol dwarven healers best healers in the land*gloin throws a few axes at tary and she is rushed to the slower ELVEN healers

[Tary]

TARY IS NOT A SHE HE IS A HE!

[Tary]

Tary's healers have special Potions and Tary is healed in no time.

[Mathew6]

excuse me, now that is plain weird cmon a guy liking lego i mean hes and OK fighter but the only reason ANYBODY likes him is cause hes cute

[Tary]

Tary shoot gloin in the leg and wounds him.

[Tary]

His archery skill is amazing I do some archery in real life and it is very difficult.

[Mathew6]

dont be so mean to gimli's father i mena i cant believe an of you lego guys dont like dwarves at all

[Tary]

Tary run up pulls out an arrow graps mathew6 by the throut and tosses him of a cliff.

[Tary]

Oh great mathew6 catchs on and pulls him self up again

[Mathew6]

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhh*mathew6 is barely saved by wounded bombur's fat belly* see look how useful dwarves are

[Tary]

gloin was throwing axes at me I was not mean to him I could have shot him in the heart and killed him but I didn't.

[Tary]

and I like dwarves just not ones that throw axes at me.

[Mathew6]

FOR THE LAST TIME WE HAVE MITHRAL ARMOR ON REMEMBER THE WHOLE SKEWED A WILD BOAR INCIDENT???????????????

[Tary]

Okay tary graps a sword and starts wacking enemys. Swords can pierce mithreil

[Tary]

Graps one of lurtz's orcs and toses him of the clif.

[Mathew6]

cmon it would take bout 50 swings to pirce mithral

[Tary]

Okay takes out and arrow and starts stabbing enemys in the head through the eye holes in there helmets.

[Tar-Ancalimë]

OKOKOKOKOK WE GET THE POINT!!!!!!!!
Enough fighting there. Violence is a BAD THING yes it is.

Anyway Tary you can't deafeat all these dwarves in a one on one wait till you have back up.
Like me? Well maybe. I'm against people who are against elves anyway.

[Tary]

Okay retret's back to camb.

[Mathew6]

well i gga may my computer controlle freinds protect my base and keep it from TOTAL destuctin while im gone

[Tar-Ancalimë]

Ha-ha too late already
*lousy elf-hater's base is destroyed*

[Mirkgirl]

It is not. *Mirky comes back right on time*

[Tar-Ancalimë]

fine fine.
I don't understand you elf-haters. like i said in another thread, i think it's the elf-lovers you hate, not the elves themselves.

[Mirkgirl]

I can answer for myself - I don't like elves and I have nothing against people who like eleves when they shut up about it.

I like to pic on elves and on fangirls just for the fun of it (and for that they are asking for this - there are loads of drooling-over-legolas-posts every day)

[Tar-Ancalimë]

that's true enough. a lot bring it on themselves (hee hee am i being slightly hypocritical here?!)
lol

[Akiba]

I have to agree and am starting to see the annoyance of it all though I still love Legolas ok so what now has it all ended are we at peace? I am confused somebody help and about before before before I was talking to mathew6 not tary you just posted before me but ok that's over

[Catz]

Guys....this is all in fun, OK? lets not get carried away with the thwacking folks over the bonce hmmmm?
that said, cheers to Matt and Tary for a good laughentdraught chatting up the male guards too eh Matt??:naughty: ;) lol lol
:catz:

[Lurtz]

ok...orc and i have returned!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! When we left, we determined that our base was gonna be destroyed, so we ran away and built another BETTER one...now with an orckish touch...wow, matthew flirting with male guards? ...musta been around elves too much...*lurtz hammers him until he is straight* ok now that that is solved, lets see some o that mithril armor and mithril arrows...wow, he even put a heat repelent on the arrow...kewl...*grabs bag of marshmallows and box of matches* ha ha ha! now look at me, all spiffy with my excellent mithril stuff...oooohhh mithrily....ok i'm done swooning over my goodies, LETS GO KICK SOME ELVEN BOOTY!!!!!!!!!! HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!

[Gowpon]

Suddenly a piggy appeared out of no where, made a few cute pig sound and said:

"Not so easy, orcky" pfbbt

She sneaked in their new base, set up bombs and got out in time.

NEW BASE DESTROYED!!!!

And then the elven troops that had got her signals rushed in and killed the remain enemy.

GO ELFY GO!!! :naughty: :cool: lol

[Pil]

*pil lets fire arrow after arrow...each with a course straight and true...into the hearts of her enemies. The look on her face the orcs and elf-bashes quail before*

*"GO FORTH" she cries and the hundreds of elf lovers pour into the orc camp...destroying who is left...blades gleaming...arrows flying like shards of sunlight. The orcs shield their eyes from the light as the army come forth with one unified brilliant white....we fight bravely...with honour...until, hours later, silence reigns and the last arrow is shot...

The troops gather together to celebrate when a lookout elf with keen eyes gives a cry, "Ai! Look, yonder, there are a group that escaped!" And sure enough we can all make out...not fleeing but running with purpose, a band of orcs and elf-bashers making their way into the gloom of the even further east. Panic spreads through the elf-lovers...what to do with this one remaining army? Pil removes an arrow from the chest of one Lurtz lying nearby and raises it to the gloomy sky. "ONWARD! WE HUNT DOWN THOSE WHO REMAIN...OUR ARMY DOES NOT TAKE PITY AND TAKES NO PRISONERS! WE WILL NOT STOP UNTIL WE ARE RID OF THEM WHO DEFY THE NAME OF LEGOLAS! THOSE WHO HAVE THE HEART...FOLLOW!" Her words sound true on the rocks of the fallen camp and each elf follows on the pursuit...taking the arrows from the fallen as they go...each wanting to avenge the death of those who lay silent in the black of orc blood...*

[Akiba]

oh wow and here we go again hey the one that rang out the call was me right pil right?? j/k but I'm glad it's on again didn't get enough leggy basher bashing last time on to war!!
*akiba jumps yet again on her noble steed and rides off ready to hunt and kill all remaining evil "ever so gracefully"* (not as good a story writer as Pil) Lead on Pil noble elven umm general captain person thing ummmm the one who started our army oh yeah!!!

[Naraku]

had alot of catching up to do but am back and Tary and ter...are going down mark my words and mathew6 I hope what i HEARD WASN/T TRUE
naraku stabs tary through the heart and then shoots akiba off her horse then retreats to new orc base

[seshomaru]

seshomaru walks in carring heavy weapons killing elves left and right (hi by the way) new recruit awating orders lurtz

[Mathew6]

good lurtz is away at the moment but i am second in command since i am his brother,ok we must go and give them somthin they dont expect, we throw so many marshmellows at them that they get all sticky and there hair gets messed up,and by the way it isnt true

[Tar-Ancalimë]

right but you can't defeat us because you see we are the army of light and grace and everything good and good ALWAYS defeats evil especially if you have a leader like Pil!!!!!!!!

Go us!!!!!!!

(hi seshomaru. nice to see you on the site having fun! lol)

[Akiba]

second in command ha! too bad your aim is horrible I am unsticky and ready and while Lurtz is away (not that it matters) th army of "light and grace" shall destroy you!!!!!! oh and Naraku your aim is bad too since you missed me by about a mile and unseated one of your own an orc! hahahahahaha could it have been the orc hmmmmm

[Tar-Ancalimë]

yes and akiba here has LOTS of back-up unlike you elf hating peeps

[Akiba]

ha ph33r my mad skillz thanks tar (btw is it ok if I call you tar?) I shall go forth and find a name for my steed while leggy bashers retreat (or should I name him Naraku so I could say "come Nraku....Heel Naraku... Stay Naraku hahaha only joking)

[Pil]

Originally posted by Tar-Ancalimë
yes and akiba here has LOTS of back-up unlike you elf hating peeps

Indeed! Pil comes racing ahead of the group...leading left, then right, pursuing the orc escapees with rage! :angry: But suddenly....they are lost...amoungst the shadows of the mountains. The elf army stop...gazing around, trying to pierce the shadows...but the land it seems, is not on our side. :(

But low...our trusty elf watcher (yes it is you!) signes to us to come look over the ridge down into the black valley. We crawl on our stomachs and slowly each elf looks over the edge....and percieves the horror of below...

An orc base...black, hard stone...emitting a foul stench...a back up built by the slaves of the orcs....some our own elves...we see them below...weeping as they work...

All heads turn to their leader to find council...i look once more to our faithful troops imprisoned below and look back with a gleam in my eye.

"We will rescue them..." i whisper...and the elves and i begin to creep slowly into the black valley...the black of the shadows now our friend rather than enemy... :knight:

[Tary]

Ha ha that blow did not hit me it hit one of my poor elven warriors but didn't kill him his being healed right nowpfbbt I HATE PEOPLE WHO WOUND MY WARRIORS but I do not agree with pill it would be good to take some prisoners have mercy an them but slay all orcs and goblins they do not deserve life.

[Orc]

Orc grabs the nearest fangirl and not very nicely deals with her!.

HUZAH!!!

[Catz]

tsk tsk tsk.......:nono: and here i am trying to get the girls to behave......*slaps Orc over the ears with the sequinned stilleto of Death sending him reeling then slipping in her earplugs hits him with a tape of Illus kareoke version of that old Barry Manilow gem, "Mandy"........Orcs and Orc drop screaming and run away*
:catz:

[Tary]

Tary graps 2 orcs by the throut and tosses them of a cliff.lol

[Tar-Ancalimë]

*Tar comes running to join the fray but without any specific purpose chanting an Elven battle-cry*

[Tar-Ancalimë]

(though the only elven battle cry i know is Hado i philinn! (fire the arrows! oh well i can yell that)

[El Ravager]

Legolas is actually my favorite character, but he DOES succeed in stealing our g/fs, so I'm in.

*walks over to Lurtz* If by my life or death I can help you I will. You have my Hackmaster+12!! lol

[Tar-Ancalimë]

GO AWAY YOU EVIL WACKED UP ENEMY!!!

and legolas does not steal any girl friends we're just crazy about him. and if he's your favorite character you have to be FOR him! what is [i]wrong[/.i] with you?

[Tary]

TRAITOR!verymad Tary say as he graps another orc by the throut and tosses him of a cliff. Tarys elfs come with there bows ready Fire Cried Tary the enemys were cought in a shower of arrows many orcs are dead Tary unsheaths his elven sword from the goblin wars and scares away a company of goblins many orcs and goblins met there doom by that sword.

[Tar-Ancalimë]

and see el rav, not all guys have to hate legolas cuz girls love him!!!

[Tary]

soon the elf bashers will start puting on collers with spikes on them because they will know how much I like grabing them by the throut and tossing them of a clifflol but for know Tary graps to more orcs by the throut and throws them of a cliff.lol

[Tar-Ancalimë]

puting?
throut?
know?
we could use a little proof-reading yes we could

(j/k im finished now for real)

[Tary]

Ha ha!

[Lurtz]

aaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaggggggggggggggghhh hhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lurtz has returned!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *girlies see lurtz and a large group of his uruk school buddies, just returning from the urukwarts school of villainess and savagery...* lurtz then teaches other orcs how to get loose of a girlie neck grab/toss off cliff "behold girlies! we now have BRAINS!" lurtz then grabs TARY by throat and throws her off a cliff...then lurtz pulls out of his bag a bull-mastiff (that is the kinda dog i have) and unleashes it upon catz...."ha ha ha!!!! brethren, take heart! for victory now seems nigh!" lurtz then pulls out his mithril arrow, sticks on a marshmallow, lights it up, and goes all out upon girlies

[Tary]

Tary graps on to a ladge and pulls HIMSELF up yanks out his sword and cut Lurtz's head off then a more of his troops apear with water buckets and save a lot of warriors on fire.

[Tar-Ancalimë]

Originally posted by Lurtz
just returning from the urukwarts school of villainess and savagery

oh give me a break!!
This is LotR for heavens sake not... argh... i won't say the word.

anyway you aren't so hot as you might think your army was all defeated while you were gone cause no one messes with elves and lives to tell the tale!!!

MUHA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

[Tary]

VICTORYlol :wiggle: :wiggle:

[Tar-Ancalimë]

ive said it before and ill say it again probably:

AS ALWAYS!!


DEATH TO ALL ELF-HATERS!

[Tary]

Elf bashers always fall.

[Mathew6]

for the last time dude we are NOT i repeat NOT elf haters........ just lego haters so lay off *trows a few hundred more axes and kills 300 elves

[Tary]

mathew6 your dwarfs must hate you they are always having to make you new axeslol Tary's elven sword is ready to slit mathew6's throat Tary says your army is defeted you have no axes left run before I slit your throat and never insult legolas agein.

[Tar-Ancalimë]

so why all the elf killing if the only elf you hate is legolas? we're defending ALL elves yes that includes legolas but i repeat ALL elves

[Lurtz]

Lurtz's head floats up off the ground a reataches itself to lurtz's body (to get the full effect of this, those who have the dvd, shortly after aragorn decapitates lurtz, rewind it on like really slow, so you see his head come back) the takes tary and tosses HIM off a cliff (soz tary for the last time, i keep forgetting) and in his rage at having his head cut off AGAIN, grabs tar and tosses him/her off the cliff, pulls out his bow, and starts barrading tary and tar with flaming marshmallow arrows, while laughing at them for trying to come back (come on guys, think of a way to come back! i don't want this thread to end so soon!)

[Tary]

Yeah if you don't hate Elfs why are you throwing axes at them?

[Tary]

Tary had a grappling hook and throws it attatchs to a tree he pulls himslelf up and stabs lurtz.

[Lurtz]

lurtz then shakes hands with tary and congartulates him for being so clever, pulls the sword through him, growls, grabs him by the neck and throws him NOT off the cliff, but into a tree (btw, i think matthew was being sarcastic, i would ask him but he is at boy scouts

[Akiba]

Lurtz this thread is no wherer near being finished ha *akiba (warrior and now trusty elf watcher)comes up from behind Lurtz on her noble steed "ever so gracefully"(oh btw which is a better name for my horse roch, roh, or rocco) draws an arrow and shoots Lurtz just as he is turning around en rejoins pil to rescue elves from foul clutches of orcsbut not before wacking mathew6 on te head a few good hundred times* wow where do these Leggy bashers keep coming from? *akiba looks around trying to spot El Ravager with watchful eye and bow and arrow in hand*

[Tary]

Tary is gravly wounded he says if I die now I shall at least die with honor.

[Akiba]

Tary can't de dude you're the only guy and our side do you wanna lose that title? *akiba finds magicl elven healing plant and applies to Tary's wounds* there all better *akiba then again jumps on horse and rides away having helped a fellow ummm team.......soldier...elf ....... person

[Lurtz]

lurtz removes the arrow which is lodged within his "pin cushion stomach" and runs over to tary to make sure he is ok "TARY! NO! DON"T DIE NOW! YOU HAVE BEEN SUCH A GOOD ENEMY!" he then tends to his wounds. lurtz runs toward akiba, and sees her "noble steed" rocco, who is saying to akiba's bf/gf "did you hear that? he/she just called me a 'noble steed!'" knocks him/her off his/her "noble steed," and he/she "ever so gracefully falls to the ground, unconcious.

[Tary]

Tary is okey he jumps up and ever so gracefully hit lurtz on the head and carries unconcious akiba back to camb.

[Akiba]

dude what iswrong with you I clearly stated I was a girl "these brnless orcs" confused by your last post r u saying my horse can talk? now 'm obviously ntgonna name him rocco what's with the b/f thing and akiba does not get knocked unconscious and would nver get knock off by her noble steed
I AM NOT UNCONSCIOUS!!!!!verymad
*akiba jumps on her noble steed ever so garcefully (ummI tink Pricess's greenleafs idea or someone's sorry about that Ive been putting it in quotations if you want 'll stop) thanks Tary for the help then goesiding off to find Lurtz and ANNIHALATE him for the wrongs has done and the insults to akiba*

[Tary]

okeylol

[Tar-Ancalimë]

Tar is a her thank you very much lurtz (hello? QUEEN! braaa-iiindead) and she never fell off no cliff thank you very much because your lousy orc sight thought a TREE was me. anyway i think you should name your steed Roch, akiba.

and ever so gracefully lurtz was annihilated cuz he dont got no backup no more!
ha ha pfbbt

and take that you elf (excuuuuuse me leggy) haters!

[Elf angel]

Elfa (Elf angel) came running ever so gracefully (actually it's me Akiba but no worry,use it for we ARE graceful creatures) to help wounded elves & start shooting arrows everywhere.. ever so gracefully & with wickedly cool moves.. hitting stupids orcs in the left eyes..hahahaha..ran back to camp with the rest of the wickedly cool elven warriors..

[Lurtz]

what happened to my buddies from the urukwartz school of villainess and savagery?...akiba u most likely haven't seen shrek...fine, you aren't unconcious...when i said "he/she" i meant that you could be a he or a she, cuz i didn't know, its hard to tell with you elven scum...lol j/k...i can see why you thought my last post was confusing, i should have read it over....
OK BACK TO THE STORY!
lurtz, who was thought to be dead, was really just really really hurt...his band of friend from school then came rushing out of the bushes, and started throwing bombs full of nytroglycerin marshmallow juice, and got the elves all covered in marshmallow stuff, which did the same as gluing them to where they were....the buddies then grabbed the hurt lurtz and took him to the uruk shaman who then fixed him right up. the now smart uruks then started replanning their strategies...

[El Ravager]

Ha! The anti Legolas army will not be taken so easily! "Haryon Ravager tulta Lothlorien otornasse Eldar!" The Brethren of Elves, having long since been divided over the issue of Uruk Hai, are once again united. The vast armies of the Brethren gather behind El Ravager, who dons his coat of Mithril and Elven helm. The Emerald in his sword's hilt glows softly as he draws it, green lightning dancing along the hackmaster's blade. "Sii!" The army of Elves charge toward the army of Legolas Greenleaf, weapons drawn... lol

[Elf angel]

WHAT???!!!!
(Hi El..:wave: )

[Lurtz]

Lurtz, now being fully healed, goes to a uruk hai town far north. he there gathers a large army (he saves some for later) and attacks the legolas army from behind! arrows flying! swords clashing! the battle is raging on! the good elves to the south, the uruk hai from the north, both fighting one common enemy: the army of legoladies! (and a few guys) as several arrows wiz past lurtz, it is clear to see that now, after coming together, the anti-leggies are much stronger and better organized. after many hours of combat, the merciful anti-legies allow the legoladies(and few guys) to retreat with what remains of their decency, soldiers, and spirit, to the east.

[Pil]

HA! That is what YOU think! Whilst this bloody battle has been going on a small number of elves i lead into the heart of the orc base. There we found elves, tortured, but not taken to the side of night yet. We carried who we could and supported those who could walk enough...and found our way back to our camp.

There we tended ills and those others who returned from the battle to be replenished. When you saw us leave...it was only to return to camp to hear the orders of pil. And here they are!

"COMBRADES! BRAVE WARRIORS OF ORLI'S ARMY! WE HAVE A MISSION! OUR ELVEN FRIENDS HAVE BEEN SAVED BUT THEY HAVE TOLD US OF MANY THINGS THAT ARE HAPPENING IN THE ORC CAMP. IT MUST BE DESTROYED ONCE AND FOR ALL!"

(P.S. Do not go into battle too quickly lurtz can u tell ur people too? give a bit of suspense and planning.)

[Lurtz]

okee day...we must rethink our strategy...maybe i'll get some reinforcements...again

[Elf angel]

Then I, the wickedly cool archer Elfa will go & get more supplies of Lembas & Minuvor..plan your attack wisely Pil since Lutz just got himself a brain..

[Tary]

Tary discovers a orcish spy he says Orcish spys in are camb find them. he swiftly chops off the head of the spy that he found.

[El Ravager]

Paladorn, Ravager's chief leutenant, met him in the counsel room. "I've heard the Greenleaf armies rescued prisoners from the Uruk's dyngeons. Is this true?" "Yes, M'lord." "The Uruk Hai are valiant and strong, but they were made to be peons and followers. They never did learn to make inpenitrable dungeons." "No, M'lord." "Have we had any reports from our agents in the Orli Army?" "Yes, Lord Ravager. We learned of the POWs, of course, and a little of their strategies. I've written it down for you." "Many thanks, Paladorn." RAvager reviewed the folded paper, and drew in a sharp breath. "Dispatch fifty footsoldiers and twenty archers to the east side of the river, and prepare our warriors in the north for attack. Once that is finished, you can set patrol lines along the western bamk and the range. Make sure word of this gets to Lurtz, but no one else." "Yes, M'lord." "Good. Many thanks, Paladorn. You are dismissed." As Paladorn turned to go, Ravager walked over to his window, and gazed out. He smelled battle approaching.

[Mathew6]

ahh greeting el ravager do you have any plans for our next attacks?

[Pil]

Pil and her army make their way under the cover of the darkness of the following night...fully stocked with everything needed for the tough time ahead...thank you elf angel for replenishing our supplies.

Warriors that had fallen are buried and those with wounds taken back to camp. There was now no sign of the battle that had taken place in this barren land...not even a blade of bent grass to show...

I had recieved confused messages from our spies that had gone ahead...apparently there was movement in the orc camp...so our plan to destroy it would involve another confrontation. But little did we know how soon it would come upon us.

As we settled down to a light and hurried luncheon in what we presumed to be morning...a strong and organised army of uruks attacked from all sides...

Chaos reigned amongst our troops...each looking for a leader to guide them. Our forces took blow after vicious blow from the uruk army and many a fair elf fell...those who had only just arrived...or had been healed...or had fought from the beginning...it was a sad moment for all.

But we did not dispair. One last stand of elven warriors held against the main throng of the uruks...whilst those who were scattered joined in what groups they could to bring down those uruks that had also been separated from their army.

A bloody scene followed...orc blood stained the rocks themselves...mingled with the fresh red of elven life...taken. But again and again the elves joined together...the group growing and growing...until there was none left separated and we stood equally strong against the uruk army.

A pause there was in the battle. Each army stood poised but still....enemies looking eachother in the eye...the whites clear... Angry growls were sent from the uruks...their foul, coarse speech were weapons in themselves against fair elven ears. But we sent back our cries of war...revenge...mixed with victory melodies....of hope.

It was then two uruks stepped forward. One large...threatening...but slow, the other smaller, but smeemingly more nimble and witty. The elves in the front lines of the army set their arrows to the bow and some drew their swords. Joined by a few of the quickest and most alert elves, Pil stepped forward also, and a light shone from her that the uruks sheilded themselves from, the jewel of light set upon her head gleamed...penetrating the black of the land. Slowly, one uruk began to speak to the elven army...

:elfqueen: :knight:

[Mathew6]

y'know what i wanna know? why you think your only fighting a orc and uruk army, didnt it seem that if a dwarf joined in the war he would bring every dwarf around, well i did

[Pil]

FINE! There are dwarves too! But will u PLEASE continue with the story! :angry: Since ur brother's not here to speak up for ur army! lol :knight:

[Mathew6]

ok then,"bombur's fat belly smothers tary and he is TRAPPED and cannot escape

[Pil]

Originally posted by Pil
Slowly, one uruk began to speak to the elven army...
:elfqueen: :knight:

THIS is where we are up to! Deal with it! For a bit of light relief with the old beer belly, scoot over to the orli's army thread, cos i think people are still bashing eachother over the head there...but here there is a real story... :)

[Tary]

Tary pokes bumber with his knife bumber goes yikes and jumbs up Tary gets up and bonks bumber on the head bumber is unconcious and Tary starts killing orcs and wounding dwarfs he has mercy on the poor little fellows.lol

[Gatsby]

Gatsby emerges from her tent (after making out with a really hot elf from mirkwood tee hee) and is shocked by what she sees. People who were once friends are waging war against each other: arrows fly, spells are being cast; swords shine in the angry night. The silent bodies of elves, men, and orcs strangle the field that separates the camps, horror rises in the woods. The noblest of shield-maidens are risking their precious lives for the honour of one. Tears consume her eyes, how had it come to this? "This must end" she mutters. Mounting her stead, Carail, she unsheathes her elven sword and rides to the centers to the center of the field. Gatsby raises her sword high into the air and calls out the fighters
"FRIENDS!!" *warriors, orcs and shield-maidens cease fighting in astonishment, yes even the orcs stop*
"LOOK AROUND YOU; LOOK AT WHAT YOU ARE DOING. THE FORUM HAS BEEN BITTERLY DIVIDED; THIS AREA WREECKS OF DEATH AND HATE AND I KNOW THAT YOU ALL ARE BETTER THAN THIS. LEGOLAS GREENLEAF OF MIRKWOOD WAS INDEED DISHONOURED (SHE MUMMBLES P.S WHAT WERE THEY THINKING, HOW COULD THEY MAKE FUN OF SUCH A FOX?!), BUT HE WOULD NOT CONDONE SUCH FIGHTING OVER SO SMALL A GRIEVENCE. TELL ME BROTHERS, SISTERS, WHEN WILL YOU LET GO OF YOUR SPITE? WHEN WILL PEACE RETURN TO THE FORUM?”
Gatsby lowers her sword but remain in the field.

[Tar-Ancalimë]

In reply the uruk warrior's words were this: (since the enemies cant do this i shall for them tee hee)

Killing our brethren, slaughtering our homes, making war on our people! This is the work of elves! This is what we see when we see elves! Dead family, friends, ruined pastures, barren wasteland where once we were mighty! For this, we shall have no mercy. For this, we shall attack until our strength is gone! Winning one battle will not avail you in the end! WE SHALL AVENGE! WE SHALL ENDURE!

And, with those words, they disappeared to count the dead and wounded, leaving those in the elf camp to see to their own wounds of body and spirit....

[Lurtz]

? i didn't get it...lets step back to when the uruk (i) speaks...

"this war has been going on far too long, what would you elves think of drawing up a treaty where we fight with harmless weapons? trouts would be the only weapon. one may not kill another, simply have fun, dissing eachother, but without killing

[Gatsby]

if need be i will act as a mediator for a treaty, anything to stop the killing.
out
gatbsy

[Tar-Ancalimë]

OK treaty! peace in ME
(sorry if you didnt like my uruk. it was way fun though)

[Akiba]

wow so there was a story and now there's a treaty ok confused??? Trouts??? Tht's cool and I have seen Shrek

[Gatsby]

okay so is everyone in agreement that there should a treaty?
out
gatsby

[Elf angel]

<I thought this was suppose to be a fun with fun battle moves to tell...then it became like a real serious battle .I like the 1st few pages where we just :trout: each other & having fun without being too serious..it is better that way i think..but this is just my opinion..>

Back to the story...Elfa ran back to enemy's camp to help the wickedly cool but wounded elven warriors.She jumped ~matrix style~ kicking Lutz in the face but ever so gracefully .
Pulled out a makeup set & start giving Lutz makeover...then while Lutz screaming"agghhgggg..i'm insane with anger..!!!",
Elfa was already back in camp...;)

[Akiba]

yeah the first few pages were pretty cool though can't say I didn't enjoy the last few pages either What happenned to Mirkgirl my arch nemesis?? hmmmmmmmm anyways hey can someone briefly tell me what is going on are we continuing or calming down and whipping out the fish? and what's up with the story what's going on?

[Lurtz]

*mathew6 slaps people silly with a trout till they cry for help:trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout:

[seshomaru]

trouts ? awwwwww oh......... oh ok seshomaru grabs two trouts using them as gopher chucks (not sure that really what the are called)and knocks out a few hundred elves:trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout::thumbs:

[Lurtz]

lurtz, now letting all people know that this is not to get too violent...cuz my username is lurtz, and i can't die! i gotta keep posting!!!!!!! ok ok ok ...only trouting or other harmless pains, like my mithril arrow of flaming marshmallows!!!!!!!! ha ha ha!!!!!!!!!! lurtz is back in business...ok i grab a trout, arrow, matches, and marshmallow...i am now ready!!!!!!! he sneaks up behind akiba's talking donkey, and gives them both a "flaming marshmallow" then when they are still in shock i trouth them a bit:elfeek: :elfeek: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :hooray:

yay for the peaceloving uruk hai

[Orc]

From over the ridgeline comes the jingle of leather and maile and the tromp of heavy clad iron boots. Even before the mighty relief column of Uruk-hai can be seen, their deep resonant war chant can be heard…..

Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam…….

As the formation crests the ridge, their fearless leader, Orc, Lord of the Uruk-hai, barks a command and they gracefully fold from a column formation into a battle line, four Uruk-hai deep. Orc begins calling cadence….


I hear the spam is flying
It’s flying overhead
We’ve come to spam the wounded
We’ve come to spam the dead

Uruk-hai
Spammer

I see my buddy lying
A trout upside his head
The captain says “He’s wounded”
But I believe he’s dead

Uruk-hai
Spammer


Orc brings the battle line to a halt half way down the ridge and survey’s the field of battle. Behind him standing rigidly at attention is a legion of fearless Uruk-hai, the only thing moving is the black banner which is gently tossed by the wind.

“Present Spam!” Orc commands. Each soldier removes a family sized can of spam from his rucksack and holds it before him.

“Arm Spam!”

The Uruk-hai grab the pull ring on the spam cans and with a quick clean yank, remove the tin cover, tossing it aside.

“Prepare to hurl……”

Each warrior assumes a throwing position, their left arms outstretched pointing towards the confused elven throng, their right hands cocked back bearing the dreaded spam can, awaiting the final order…..

“Hurl!!!!!!!!!!”

With a mighty HUZAH!! The Uruk-hai hurl their deadly missiles in a graceful arc towards the elves. Carnage suddenly erupts among the elves as the spam bombs splatter in their midst’s. Spam is flying everywhere, and nary an elf is capable of escaping the barrage without getting spam in his hair.

Among the screams of horror from the elves can be heard…..


“OH MY GOD! MY HAIR!!!!”

“Not meat, ANYTHING but meat!”

“Run away…. Run away….”


“Present haddock,” commands Orc, and every Uruk-hai brandishes a large evil looking fish.

“Forward…. March”

[Tary]

Pulls off orcs helmet and hits them on the head with it.

[Mathew6]

hey no violence tary,*mthew6 hits with a few more trout

[Catz]

O.....M......G.......NOT THE SPAM!!!!
and upping the fish on us eh?????
*catz leaps onto her horse which has very conveniently appeared behind her and rallies the troops, with promises of double rations of Strawberry bubble bath and hair gel*
OK......*she eyes the ranks of orcs* just for the haddocks....this requires the BIG GUNS.......*turns to the Elf ranks*.....OK ladi....errrrrr i mean.....men ....produce ARMS!!!!
The sight that meets the eyes of the orcs in response to this order, chills the inhuman blood in thier veins as they are faced with a phalanx of advancing Elves, each on armed with......a CURLING IRON.....and its too much......they break and run, pursued by frustrated hairdressing Elves

oh and i love the song Orc lol lol lol
:catz:

[Tary]

I shall turn lurtz into a bat.:batty:

[Catz]

baseball or cricket???;)
:catz:

[Mathew6]

of course no cricket cause its not as popular as baseball,at least to me cause i live i america*mathew6's dwarves come from the side with waht? o my it cant be wrinkled clothes the elves army scatters at the sight of the mighty dwarves with their untidy things

[Catz]

Hah!!!! we are prepared for that......SPECIAL FORCES DEPLOY.....
a small troop of elves detach from the main body of troops...as they get closer it can be seen they are armed with irons....and spray cans of STARCH!!!!
ye shall not remain rumpled for long in the face of my dryclean up squad........(:rolleyes: yeah, yeah i know....awful pun...but it IS 5.40 am here...gimme a break....)
Mats dwarves back away..........
:catz:

[Pil]

This is different.

:trout: :trout: :trout: BASH BASH BASH!!!!!!!

The starched up dwarves can no longer move in their stiff uniforms and fall over...the only way for them to get back up is to REMOVE the clothes *shudder*...but the elves run back towards the orcs before it gets too ugly... :o lol

Elves (now cleaned up :angel: )with curling irons in their scabbards, trout in one hand and mousse cans/hairspray in the other, prepare to attack...

"CHARGE!" A mass of hair utensils and foam spews onto the orcs...and they are smouthered...with only one solitary conditioned ponytail to show... lol :evil:

:elf:s rule! :thumbs: :loveyou: :)

[Mathew6]

nooooo not starch hurry we must fall back and get our softener but we wil be back

[Pil]

He he! A small band of elves runs after the dwarves...who are hobbling along like they are in straight jackets....roflmao...determined not to let them get the softener...queue a messy battle involving a lot of silky smooth beards! lol

[Mathew6]

may your beard wither tary,and may ours grow ever longer,that is what i say to you

[Pil]

pfbbt pfbbt pfbbt

ELVES DON'T HAVE BEARDS!

pfbbt pfbbt pfbbt

[Mathew6]

that is what makes you such girli girls even when ur boy elves , o well the dwarves have returened and are rearing for battle and now have brought along plenty of softener and have a new weapon, a blow drying yes get them and burn them with a blow dryer

[Orc]

The mighty Orc begins rallying his beleagured troops who are despirately fending of the curling iron wielding elves. Looking back up the ridgeline he bellows:

"Bring fourth the gum-o-pult!!"

Rolling over the top of the ridge come a series of a dozen catapults follwed by a line of goblins. Each goblin starts at the back of the line and opens a new pack of gum, chewing one piece at a time and by the time they get to the front of the line they spit the chewed gum into catapult bucket, returning to the end of the line to start the process over again. Within minutes the gum-o-pult buckets are heaping with chewed bubble gum.

Orc faces his elven foes and bellows:

"Surrender or feel my wrath!"

Getting no response from the elves, he commands the gum-o-pults to fire.....

Goblin chewed pieces of bubble gum fall upon the elven ranks most of them finding their intended targest: the long silky hair of the elves. Within seconds each elf has more than 10 pieces of gum stuck in his or her hair.

The elves begin to weep, moan and shreik in agony, for they know that not even hobbit peanut butter can get goblin chewed bubble gum out of thier hair. Stumbling over each other they flee the field...

[Tary]

Tary pulls out his sword and frightens away the goblins (if you have not read the hobbit you will not understand that)

[Tar-Ancalimë]

ummm yeah ummmm i dont know how to fight like this too funny i am not a funny person so ill just sit back and yeah moral support i guess anyway i am for the elves down with orcs and dwarves too i guess since theyre part of this no im not a cheerleader but yea elves


...riiiiight...

[Akiba]

ok gonna go with tar on this one but dn't like the cheerleader part but yeah i just have to say go elves! for now but not before wacking Lurtz and Orc on their heads with a huge trout ROCH IS NOT A DONKEY HE IS A NOBLE STEED you evil ogre looking ..........thing!!!! ok ad that's all out of me GO PIL AND HER ARMY OF ELVES!!!! *akiba goes to sit on the sidelines with tar*

[seshomaru]

sehomar comes in on his truly noble pig (still with gopher chucks(i think thats their name) wacks her and "noble steed" on the head with huge trouts and knocks her and her out . "noble steed" seshomar rides away on his pig stepping on the "nobel steed":trout: :trout: :trout: roflmao

[Tar-Ancalimë]

umm akiba are you saying we are cheerleaders?

the school i went to the cheerleaders were the most unpopular girls in school... i guess a lot of that carried over cuz i think cheerleaders are stupid

and you didnt knock akiba out cuz you got mixed up and knocked out one on your own team then you got into a huge fight youre like the orcs of mordor can never agree

[Elf angel]

Huge :trout: on Seshpfbbt

[Catz]

but at the back of the dissarrayed elvish ranks there is a commotion....its catz!!! First she sets Akiba and Tar to cleaning up those poor Elves already hit
And when youre done with them....send them to fight the Dwarves....that way they can get a blow dry...that should cheer em up lol lol
she then puts plan "beautiful complexion" into action.......having fought this foe before in another place she knows what evil lurks in the heart of Lurtz(and all the rest of em.....Orc in particular ;) lol ) and has come prepared, handing out strange cylindrical objects to the rear ranks and then advancing on the gum o pult with her group
PARASOLS UP!!!!!
suddenly it is clear what the strange objects are, as a dozen or more parasols of Lorien are unfurled
How did you THINK we maintain our lovely skin and unearthly pallor Hmmmmmm?
under the protection of the parasols the elves reach the gum o pult and gum up its works.....bubble wrapping several dozen orcs along the way
hmmm the battle is won but the war is not over.....
:catz:

[seshomaru]

oh yeah take that u crazy elf:trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout: :trout:

[Elf angel]

Take what Sesho?? Trout?

Not so fast...you & your piggy need a bath lol lol. Tie them up my friends,after that put perfume on them ...don't forget the pretty petals for the hair..hahaha now Sesho,your own orcy pals will :trout: you...:trout:

[Tar-Ancalimë]

OK akiba and i will be in charge of cleaning up hot male elves!!! oooooh la la!!!!!!!!!
yum yum

[Lurtz]

aye...i think my uruks are traumatized...they are doing eachother's hair with a curling iron and some mousse they stole from the elves...ugh...disturbing...i go to the camp where the horrific incident is occuring..."you lousy wussies! stop that! or do i have to invent a new weapon in place of my arrow-with-marshmallow, the flaming curling iron? *grabs a curling iron* aye, this looks like it might just work! *uruks all of a sudden realize what they were doing, and snap back into normality* aye, that's more like it...now, who got the secret weapon?

back at elf camp
lego is enjoying his popularity, when all of a sudden, a white cloud seems to be falling...*SPLAT!* the entire elf camp is covered in boiling marshmallow juice! *SPLAT!* the elf camp is now entirely sticky and stuck, to a worse extent of the dwarve's defeat...

lurtz then prepares his stuff for another long day at school tomorrow and goes to bed

[Tary]

I was not in camb I am not sticky I will turn you into a fruit bat :batty:

[Catz]

oh come ON Lurtz:rolleyes: lol lol ....howd ya get the marshmallow to float???
ok then.....good thing all the elves have been shrink wrapped for the evening isnt it? hehehe you wondered how we stayed so immaculate didnt you?...ill just have to get Akiba and Tar to do a little clean up...
BTW....loooove those new Uruk hairstyles :naughty: ;) lol
:catz:

[Gowpon]

Wow, things go on really fast! I got confused!lol :o

[Tary]

LURTZ IS A FRUIT BAT ha HA HA:batty:

[El Ravager]

After makin gout with Arwen (and avoiding a very angry Aragorn), El Ravager returned to the battle to see.....trout everywhere! This was terrible! Why trout! They call this a battle! Ravager drew his salmon head arrows and started firing at anything that moved. Ha! trout! Salmon is sooo much better. :grin:

[Mathew6]

what how dare you you salmon!! that is a siisy weapon*pulls out a swordfish *take this,it may be to dull to hurt for certain reasons but it will protect you well

[Pil]

A-ha! *pil pulls out her elven swordfish...all razor sharp and 'ever so elegant'*

(lol) Put 'em up matthew6! :battle:

Meanwhile.............the small band of elves that went after the dwarves the first time are now concentrating on ruining the uruk's new hair styles (roflmao)...and fire water bombs at will! :knight: :elfqueen:

[Akiba]

salmon? sword fish? akiba joins in tar in the cleaning and healing of extremely hot elf guys oh yeah and no I can't stand cheerleaders at my school anyways *Akiba sees hot elf with a bit of marshmallow oin his hair cleans it off for him he then takes her hand and they go off to......ha(like I'm gonna tell you ppl)*

[Lurtz]

oooohhhhhh akiiiiba....who here has seen the end of waterboy?

ok...lurtz then sees utter chaos..akiba and an elf making love...mathew and pil dueling with swords...he then decides he can't take it anymore...he then pulls out a tuna and slaps everyone until they are stinging and are bright red

[Akiba]

you nasty minded person bad Lurtz and I have The Waterboy I love that movie Tsk Tsk Tsk Lurtz *akiba whips out her emergency trout and slaps Lurz on the face for saying such bad things about Akiba* What exactly does the end of The waterboy have to do with anything and wht's with the ooohhhh but agreed to stay out of this one so yeah parting with the hot elf is such sweet sorrow but must go help other elfs soothe and smoothe their beautiful faces after tat Lurtz rampage

[Tar-Ancalimë]

mmmm im already there akiba!!!

wow!! like OMG! like these elves they are so hot.

[Gowpon]

:duh: Tar, ELVES ARE ALWAYS HOT :naughty: :naughty: (NOT LIKE SOME PEOPLE, OR ORC$, YOU KNOW...lol :naughty: )

[Lurtz]

uruk women are HOT! you guys obviously haven't seen any, but when you guys do, you will be all WOO WOO!
i then start spraying the now cleaning up elf camp with tar. they try to get it off their all-so-perfect faces and hair, but to no avail. they must quickly think of a way to remove this stuff before the uruks start stealing their hairspray (don't worry guys, i'll try to get you some time, cuz i don't wanna hafta try to destroy EVERY SINGLE SMUGGLED BOTTLE OF HAIRSPRAY again...

[Tar-Ancalimë]

ewww... orc chicks...

actually Orc wrote a pretty good story with an orc chick in it... so i guess to orcs orc chicks are pretty damn good lookin;. If you were an orc.

OK about the tar- I DONT THINK SO MISTER URUK! you must be having delusions. I dont see any tar, do any of you elves?

[Akiba]

nope no tar except for you orc chicks uugghhh WOO!WOO! really hmm brilliant thik Lurtz is having those weird dreams again where he thinks he is waging war against elves and winning poor poor Lurtz somebody should see to hisproblem while I see to hot elves

[Pil]

Pil takes a swipe at matthew6's swordfish and cuts off its nose....thing.... leaving him dismayed and weaponless...haha! lol

Then she runs over to Lurtz....AND GIVES HIM A BIG SLAP WITH THE NOW BLUNT SWORDFISH! :trout: (only a swordfish)

Get your head sorted! I can't fight someone that is insane cos it wouldn't be fair...be devious and clever....if it's possible...hmm... roflmao

[Mathew6]

hey leave my bro alone what did he do to u, other than beat you bruise you throw u off a cliff and pour marshmellows on u?

[Tar-Ancalimë]

OK you officially have problems along with the rest of your little army thing...

[Pil]

lol *high five for enthusiasticly witty Tar-Ancalime!* :thumbs: NICELY PUT! They all DO have problems don't they? We should start an uruk drop in centre...

WELCOME TO THE HAIRSPRAY ANON. SOCIETY.
Open to all uruks...orcs...dwarves if needs be....that have felt themselves being dragged into the vicious, daily cycle of...hairspray using. Here you can tell us your problems and we can deal with them in the way we see fit....mainly to chop your heads off...but hey! We might not get through the protective crust of the hairspray...! roflmao

[Pil]

PIL HAS AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE!

Those of you that hang around in 'Emelin' in bagend fiction will already be aware of this...but my weekend is set to be one hell of a busy one! Bonos-girl is having an all weekender party thing...it's gonna rock, but i won't leave me time to be here to guide the army...so...fight amoungst yoursleves...or select a temporary leader (catz...tar, tary, Ea...there are so many!) So i'll see you on monday!

*pil waves a fond, and temporary goodbye to her troops* :wave: :(

[Tar-Ancalimë]

Of course Pil you're brilliant.

Among the other services we offer:

AA (we know you orcs need this!)

Therapy for the bashing all you elf-bashers have received

Image remodeling (elves don't work only on themselves you know)

And our piece de resistance:

Counciling for Anti-Elven people. It's a four week course that will go in depth into your reasons for disliking them. We promise you, by the end of this course you will be drooling in ecstasy!

All who wish to sign up please PM me ASAP. Spaces are limited and going fast!

[Mathew6]

o cmon my dwarves will destroy your building and chase you all out with old chocolate wrappers

[Tar-Ancalimë]

We can offer help for chocolate addictions too! :)

But hurry! We've almost no room left.

[Pil]

Ok....i'm ACTUALLY still here...but my mother is bugging me to come off the net so it probably won't be for long...:angry:...but COME ON matthew6! You KNOW you want your own little badge with your name and addiction id number...hehe...what class will you be taking first? :huh: lol

[Tar-Ancalimë]

lol youre great pil. roflmao

[Pil]

:cuddles: Tar-Ancalime! U too! :)

How many we got so far? I need to sort out hairspray supplies and dinners and stuff...lol

[Mathew6]

fine ill take the elf hater course but i doubt it will change me

[Tar-Ancalimë]

OK PM me. I hope there are still seats availiable...

[Pil]

STEP ONE: *pil pulls out a tape*

play this in your sleep *plays it on tape player...*

"YOU LOVE ELVES
YOU LOVE ELVES
YOU LOVE ELVES"

It'll work guaranteed! lol

[Tar-Ancalimë]

As far as numbers go Pil, let's see...

OK 8 are taking AA... all dwarves, incedentally!

Therapy for bashing... 6! wow... I didn't know so many people bashed elves!

Image remodling... holy smoke! 10 and they're all orc chicks... guess they want some of the drooling that's been all given to elven chicks!

and the counciling has received 8 members.

9 want to take your hair spray course Pil!

very nice figures... i can see it all adding up already...

[Pil]

OOOOOH! Heads up! Lurtz is about in this thread! Wanna sign up eh matey?! lol

[Tar-Ancalimë]

Of course he does... PM me... there a still a few seats left. Not in Image remodeling though tis full oh and so is hair spray course. gee how popular we are getting here pil!

[Pil]

FAB! Our army will be increasing in no time! (lol)

[Tar-Ancalimë]

for sure!

bye Pil have fun this weekend

[Pil]

Is it just me or does anyone else think matthew6 is getting a :trout:ing from bro?! lol

[Pil]

Bye Tar! I'm going soon too! See ya! :cuddles:

[Tar-Ancalimë]

:cuddles:

[Lurtz]

aye! uruks need not therapy! i was asleep...then pil hit me on the head with her swordfish and knocked me into a deep sleep...of which i just awoke! *lurtz signs up for therapy*

[Pil]

Brill! lol What do you find most troubles you about elves? lets take these problems face on. :) lol

[Tar-Ancalimë]

and what most troubles you about those who love elves?

surely if we solve this problem we can solve your problem of being bashed!

[Tary]

Who will be the temporary leader?

[Lurtz]

*lurtz has a fishy look on his face*

hrm. yes. what troubles me most about elves is there ability to steal every single one of my girlfriends.

[Tar-Ancalimë]

ha-HA! thats should show you who really wins in the end!

(PS we have a counsiling option for that too :))

[Lurtz]

*lurtz still looks fishy* they also make me made b/c they always are putitng us uruks down

[Pil]

I'm back people and ready to help lurtz get over his childhood uruk traumas....so...lurtz...got any complexes recently? lol

We don't put uruks down on purpose...it just comes naturally as a defence when you guys bash the elves...grr...you have to admit...elf-bashing started before uruk-bashing! :huh: :nono: :)

[Akiba]

too too true

[Lurtz]

lurtz still looks extremly fishy..."speaking of uruk bashing, what childhood traumas could have POSSIBLY driven you to actually KILL uruks, chopping them into tiny pieces?"

[Tar-Ancalimë]

hey wait were counsling you not visa versa!!

"speaking of elf bashing, what childhood traumas could have POSSIBLY driven you to actually KILL elves, chopping them into tiny pieces?"

[Gowpon]

(Ah! So good to be active again!)

Gowpon the piggy looked at Lurz, simply confused by his conversation, walked over, put a big "I love Orli" tag on him and ran away.


lol :naughty: :cool: :thumbs:

[Pil]

:thumbs: :thumbs: :thumbs:

lol

NICE ONE! :cuddles: :)

I really think you should get a sun visor...t-shirt...pants...or summut, with I LOVE LEGGY on them, Lurtz...it would make a very valid addition to your badly designed uruk-wardrobe! :huh: lol :rolleyes: :stomper:

[Mirkgirl]

Hehe you all really seem to enjoy it posting in the Anti Lego army... is this because everyone of you has the hidden desire to be one of us :naughty:

[Pil]

pfbbt

I DON'T THINK SO-O! :nono: lol

as IF! roflmao

[Eowyn]

what a strange mind you have mirkgirl! lol